TAYLOR FIELD (SBP) — In what was supposed to be an enjoyable evening turned into horror for 61 year old Otto Pavlovski.  The long time Saskatchewan Roughrider season ticket holder literally froze his “dairy air” to the wooden benches at Taylor Field in Regina Friday night.

Pavlovski was gently lifted from his seat by security who were trying not to incur further damage to the buttocks of the disgruntled man.

“What’s with these Goddam seats?” muttered Pavlovski as he was escorted by security to the get medical attention, “What’s with this Goddam cold?

“It’s all that Goddam (Saskatchewan Roughrider GM) Al Ford’s fault!!”

The temperature at game time was about 1 degree Celsius but rapidly dropped shortly after kickoff. Fans were warned that the weather was going to cool off since it was only October in Saskatchewan and everyone who has a farmer’s almanac knows that the summer was supposed to be “cooler than normal”.

“I mean, it’s just common sense,” scoffed security guard Rocco Alfredo, “Doesn’t anyone pay attention to the almanac anymore?” Alfredo then rushed off to calm a fight between a Roughrider fan and a Ti-Cat fan who had been trading verbal insults while waiting in line at a concession stand.

Pavlovski was treated for first degree frost bite on his buttocks and was recommended to not sit for at least an hour to let the medication take effect.

“You can’t tell me what to do!” shouted an angry Pavlovski at the medical staff, “I have been going to games since before you were born. You can go to hell!” Pavlovski then marched back to his seat grumbling something about how things were better in his day when general manager Al Ford was not running the team.

Ford was unavailable for comment.

“You know,” medical attendant Shelley Stumpowski said of the incident, “the only thing that makes this job worth it is that I get to see the Riders lose for free.”

She was right, the Rider’s lost 42-14.

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