Archive for March, 2010

NORTH ATLANTIC ICE SHELF (SBP) – In the most shocking, most sensational turn of events in the past decade, golf superstar Tiger Woods admitted to having sex with former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin. The latest extra marital affair for Woods was committed on a global warming induced melting ice burg that used to be the home of a cuddly polar bear. The news comes just before Woods was to return to the PGA Tour and, for no reason, the ice burg was shaped like a circumsized penis. Full Story »

REGINA (SBP) – Confirming the deepest, darkest fears of many residents, Saskatchewan Premier Brad Wall unveiled the latest step in his march towards socioeconomic Armageddon. The wolf in sheep’s clothing used the provincial budget as a platform to open the door to an American-style, user pay winter vacation homes. Full Story »

REGINA (SBP) – Imagine this, if you will: it’s late at night.  You go to your garage.  You unlock the car door and proceed to get in.  But, you stop.  You feel a presence in the garage.  A presence…you might have felt before.  The shadows, though familiar, seem strangely friendly no more.  They are in league with whatever hides among them.  They are evil, predatory, and are closing in.  Suddenly, darkness grabs you.  This is the way mercy ends.  These are your last moments on earth.  And, just so you know, these final moments aren’t spent with Colin Thatcher. Full Story »