ESTEVAN (SBP) – Everyone stops and stares at him. His two teeth are gone, as they can plainly see. Who can he blame for this catastrophe?

“I don’t know”, said the annoying little kid in his whiney voice, “But my one wish on Christmas Eve is as plain as can be.

“All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth,” cried the annoying little kid, “My two front teeth. My two front teeth. All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth…”

The annoying little kid knew for awhile that he was going to lose his teeth eventually. His mother had explained over and over again that, as people grow up and little boys become little men, they lose their baby teeth. The timing of the event, however, left a lot to be desired.

“See my two front teeth?” said the annoying little kid, “My two front teeth…”

“You know, sometimes I just want to cuff that boy up-side the head,” grunted the annoying kid’s father, “He’s just that annoying!” The annoying kid’s father then whipped his hand in empty air and made a snapping noise.

“It seems so long since I could say ‘Sister Suzie Sitting on a Thistle’,” lamented the annoying little kid, whose voice sends waves upon waves of irritation up one’s spine, “Gosh, oh gee, how happy I’d be if I could only whistle.”

Classmates of the annoying little kid have been reportedly avoided the irksome lad since his tooth extraction and some are apologetic that they were not responsible for the loss of the two front teeth.

“I could have punched his lights out easy,” said one schoolyard bully, “I could have given him one good Wham!”

Reasons behind the annoying little kid’s ostracism at school include his whiny voice, repetitious dialogue as well as the use of long outdated phrases like “gosh” and “oh gee”. In his defense, the annoying little kid offered an explanation for his behaviour.

“Gee, if only I could have my two front teeth. Then I could wish you Merry Christmas!”

At that moment, the annoying kid’s father, his patience obviously exhausted, then cuffed the annoying little kid up-side the head and told him to go to his room. The annoying little kid was further instructed to not come back out until he had something else to talk about besides his missing two front teeth.

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