Area Man Hates His Fucking Job

SASKATOON (SBP) — After 8 unfulfilling weeks at his new job, Joe Shmoe has finally had enough and readily admits that he hates his fucking job. The revelation came to him after being asked to do yet another menial task at his stupid fucking place of work.

“I fucking hate this fucking job,” said Shmoe, a marketing assistant for a small financial company in Saskatoon, “I really can’t say this enough but I fucking hate it.”

Although the stupid fucking job originally looked like a promising and budding career move, Shmoe quickly found that all was not what it seemed.

“They told me all this bullshit in the fucking interview that they had this big fucking project they wanted me to be a part of,” explained the disgruntled and thoroughly pissed off employee, “And then I get here and it’s all fucking cut and paste. It’s fucking shit work!”

The term “cut and paste” refers to a menial method by which a computer operator highlights typewritten work, asks the computer to copy it and then moves the menial fucking text over to another bullshit document. The fucking computer is then asked to do the simple-minded task of pasting it into the fucking document.

“It’s so fucking beneath me it isn’t even fucking funny!” snapped the angry Shmoe.

The overqualified employee had graduated with honours from university and worked on successful major national campaigns with other companies. Shmoe’s project management skills were put to the test on those projects — not like they are now at his current motherfucking son of a bitching job.

“Fuck,” said Shmoe, “My fucking skills are going to fucking waste here!”

The incident that set off Shmoe was when his supervisor told him that one bullshit out-of-the-way document was not printing properly on the company’s sadly out-dated printer.

“They treat it like this multi-million dollar corporation is going to go tits-up because I worked with a document that doesn’t print properly on an antique fucking printer.” said Shmoe, “Like, cry me a fucking river!”

Shmoe then suggested the corporation should open their tight-ass wallets and spend some fucking money on something that was fucking built in the fucking 1990’s. And, oh yeah, how about fucking training the fucking employees so they fucking know how to fucking use it.

“Like, fuck me in the ass with a fine-tooth comb!” snapped Shmoe, “I’m not a fucking miracle worker!”

When asked if he was looking for other employment that would challenge him, Shmoe was brief and to the point:

“You bet your sweet fucking ass I am!”

Until more suitable employment is found, Shmoe has vowed he will keep his fucking swearing to a fucking minimum while at his stupid fucking place of fucking work.

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