New Rider Regime “Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing”

REGINA (SBP) – With a winning record and preparations being made for their first home playoff game in 19 years, the Saskatchewan Roughriders have struck fear in the province’s citizens thanks to their new management.  The new management – which was changed for the sake of change – have introduced a new concept to Rider fans; a new concept which is frightening new territory for the long suffering fans.

“I knew when this new Rider regime came in, that they had a hidden agenda,” said long time Rider fan Lorna Calbert, “I knew we couldn’t risk changing the old regime.  And, now, we are headed for the old Alberta-style of football with a ‘for profit’ team.”

Alberta-style football, over the past 16 years, has featured such terrifying events such as many home playoff games and 6 Grey Cup championships; 3 each from division rivals Edmonton and Calgary.  In addition to playoff success, Alberta-style football also features a two-tier ownership as Edmonton is a publicly owned team while Calgary is privately owned.

“As you can see, the management of the Roughriders has risked change to follow Alberta and, now look at what’s happened,” continued Calbert, “Not everyone has access to a ticket to a game anymore, the wait times at the concession stands have increased dramatically, and, with the team now offering Rider shares, they are well on their way to being privatized.

“I miss the days when our team was a bunch of meek and mild lovable losers that played in front of a half empty stadium and had to beg for money every year just to stay in operation.  That was the kind of team the entire country embraced.  Now look at the dark path they are travelling!”

Under the new management, the Roughriders have seen a horrifying increase in attendance and merchandise revenue.   In addition to this, there has been a concerning decrease in crime related statistics as well as not a single national news story about a player on trial.

“This lack of crime and unruly behaviour clearly shows how repressive the new management is on its players,” continued Calbert, “This is what happens when you expect discipline and accountability from people.  They start to concentrate on the task at hand and, dare I say they cease to become themselves?”

Added Calbert:  “This new regime is a wolf in sheep’s clothing and it’s scary as hell.”

After risking a terrifying change, the Roughriders are enjoying one of their best seasons statistically with a 12-6 record, good for second place in the western division.  The first home playoff date in 19 years goes November 11 against the Calgary Stampeders.  And, for the first time in many years, Rider management further terrified Saskatchewan residents by already announcing that the team will be profitable for the 2007 season.

“This craziness has got to be stopped!” exclaimed Calbert, “This is not the Saskatchewan way!”