Shitty Service Unaffected By Air Canada Strike |
SASKATOON (SBP) — Travellers around the country noticed no discernible change in dissatisfaction with their flight experience after thousands of Air Canada customer service agents went on strike across the country. The airliner has been left scrambling to keep up it’s customer service levels to it’s traditional standard of “shitty”.
“I’m still standing in long lines, having my flight changed at will, and being treated like a second class citizen,” said an Air Canada customer, ”I’m concerned that things will get worse when the agents go on strike.
“Oh? They’re on strike right now? Wow, well, I didn’t notice much of a change. Boy is my face red!”
To continue with the standard shitty level of service, Air Canada has it’s 1,700 managers taking over for the 3,800 employees who are now walking the picket lines. With a manager-to-employee ratio of 1:2, the shitty service levels at Air Canada will only drop by about 20%. The drop is expected to be hardly noticeable by the airliner’s customers.
“They lost my luggage in the very same manner that they did weeks ago,” said an Air Canada business class traveller, “And, I swear their phone customer service still requires you to navigate their labyrinth of menus while waiting for hours. I still wait in lines, only to be treated like an insect at a picnic.
“Honestly, Air Canada has done a masterful job at keeping it’s customer service at it’s current standard during this work stoppage. If there is a strike happening, I’d like to see evidence of it.”
Air Canada union bosses have cried foul over the airline’s ability to maintain the company’s gold standard of shitty customer service.
“Having half the people provide the same level of shitty service is an outrage!” said an Air Canada union boss, “The smug and snark is something we can understand that is easy to copy. But, performing the same amount of work with half the amount of unionized employees is something that we cannot comprehend and think that there is something underhanded going on.”
Continued the union boss: “Where’s the extended coffee breaks? Who’s saying things like ‘That’s not in my job description?’ Where’s the sense of entitlement and impunity? Those are the things you just cannot duplicate without a union environment. It is situationally impossible.”
While talks between the union and it’s employer have reached a tentative agreement, air travellers can rest assure that a consistent level of shitty service will continue during the transition phase to when regular employees eventually return to the job.
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